TRUMP...THE MOST USED PRESIDENT

Donald Trump, after only five days, is proving to be the most used US President ever.

Far from being a purposeful and decisive President, Trump has spent his first days doing the bidding of those corporations and wealthy men who recognize a stooge when they see one.

Yes, Trump has been busy. But does anyone really believe that this man of exhibition rather than substance is researching, discussing, consulting, debating or thinking long and hard on the issues on which he has taken action? Of course not. What matters to Trump the appearance not the actuality.

The issues facing Americans are complex and nuanced. Trump is not.

Yet already, in the first five days, without plans to deal with the consequences, he has approved two pipelines long the subject of controversy, required government employees to withhold necessary environmental and agricultural information from the public, begun the process of wiping out health care for millions, agreed to bring back torture, withdrawn from trade agreements with our allies, threatened to take another country's oil by force even if it starts a war, began moving an embassy which also may start a war and, well, the list goes on.

Each of these actions is worthy of the most serious scrutiny a leader and his/her advisers can give to the decision making process. None of these actions was anything more than theater for Trump.

Donald Trump is an empty vessel into which those with money and power, including at least one foreign leader, are pouring their directives and Trump plays puppet.

COLD ANGER

It's time for Cold Anger and a lot less Hot Anger.

Hot Anger is, well, hot. Flammable. Easily co-opted by others for their own causes. Even turned against us. Hot Anger is directed at a target we cannot obtain. It's the easy joining of friends to parade our anger when we feel helpless. The destruction of what is in our path because the real cause of our anger is beyond our reach.

Trump is President-elect. Barring jail, while possible since he is in court for both fraud and rape, his taking office is immutable. Spending time trying to undo over two centuries of the peaceful transfer of power will only lead to failure. Or perhaps lead to the destruction of the country we want so desperately to save from what will certainly be a cruel and chaotic four years.

Cold Anger is that roiling in the pit of our stomach, present constantly and not allayed since November 8th. Cold Anger tells us we must act. Cold Anger is sustainable. Cold Anger looks at the situation, parses it for possible alternatives, organizes like minded others and takes targeted action. Cold Anger changes what it sees in front of it, one task at a time. Cold Anger parades only for a specific, attainable objective.

Right now we are in that restless grief that knows there is a next step, but cannot see that step clearly. I am there too.

Here is what I will do first. I will commit myself to helping others stay safe. This is on me. I can choose to do this without permission or agreement from others

I will speak up. I will speak against racism, sexism, xenophobia, homophobia, misogyny, and every other act that threatens another citizen based on their race, country of birth, color, religion, sexual preference or gender identity. I will act to stop any of the above, right there, as it is happening. Verbal or physical. If I need more training to understand how to intervene effectively, I'll get that training.

I will have this conversation and encourage others to have this conversation with friends, neighbors, book clubs, bowling leagues, golf games, card games, potlucks, dinner parties, social media, any gathering of people who care about America. I will be insistently polite, but I will not be afraid; I will not be silenced.

Second, I will pay attention. I will know what is happening and know the facts. I will understand the options for alternatives when I disagree. I will not hide in everyday life. I will not retreat just because I am not the first affected, the first to be attacked, the first to lose my American rights or benefits. I will not bury my head until it is my ox being gored.

Third, I will constantly be on the lookout for those who believe as I do, for allies. While I can do much as an individual, we are not just stronger together, we are more effective at producing change together. And I will not just look at traditional allies. As the Trump Presidency proceeds, more and more of his supporters will understand the con for which they fell. It is not too soon to begin talking and gathering strength.

I will not wait for a "leader". I will gather real people, join our minds and hearts and trust that leadership will emerge; whether sooner or later.

All of the above is a big ask. Consult the pit of your stomach to know if it is worth the effort.

STEPPING DOWN: THIS DECADE OF MINE

It began with Roy William, beloved brother to my Mother, dead at 20 of lymphosarcoma; the Uncle I never knew but heard about all my life. Grandpa, who sat me on his lap and entertained by putting olives on all ten fingers, was my first funeral at five years old, brain tumor. And Aunt Sylvia whose matter of fact sharing of her “different bra” and what that meant in an era of silence. Then Aunt Billie whose lungs were riddled with cancer and Grandma, whose pain from colon cancer lasted a terrifying three years. 

I grew up, life passed. Then the impact hit home again as body parts disappeared; my husband’s kidney in 1988, my sister’s entire lower jaw in 1992, my Mother’s breast in 1998. Fortune smiled, survivorship, unnamed but welcome, reigned in our lives. It would be after retiring from work life and encountering the LIVESTRONG Foundation before I truly began to understand “Cancer may leave your body, but it never leaves your life."

It is always dangerous to try to assess something that is not quite over. In 2004, wandering through retirement and wondering which on the list of my fifty great volunteer ideas I should choose, the LIVESTRONG Foundation gently intruded. So much for my list. But finding my passion more than made up for the unexpected detour. I became a LIVESTRONG volunteer; a LIVESTRONG Leader and then Senior Leader to be exact. Positions from which I am stepping down on March 31.

Now, after a decade of attending LIVESTRONG Summits, becoming a LIVESTRONG Leader and then a Senior Leader; participating in dozens and dozens of conferences, coalitions, committee meetings; reading and talking to anyone who cared about cancer; designing fliers and cards and notices and events, and always fundraising; here is what I know has been important. People.

For ten years the stories of cancer patients and their families have consumed my life. Many were LIVESTRONG Leaders themselves. Many were participants in what became our first and continuing local project, the Cancer Support Group. More than I can count are those who became Facebook friends because the cancer community tends to share stories, resources, triumphs and pain. And, most dear, are those who I met here in Lewiston because they had a need and I could help.

A cancer diagnosis when you live in a rural community often means fewer options for treatment; perhaps traveling many hundreds of miles for treatment; figuring out transportation when you can’t or shouldn’t drive, air travel is out of financial reach, friends and family can’t get away; arranging for long periods of time away from home, family and work for either local or distant treatment, recovery or travel; clinical trials too far away to be feasible; fewer support resources; fewer financial resources. In summary everything’s fewer, fewer, fewer and harder to access. The loneliness of a cancer diagnosis magnified.

It is their stories, successes and sometimes their loss, that will be with me forever. Each person, each story was unique like a quilting square. And like a quilting square, each story formed a piece of the larger pattern that became the encompassing base for my life. Each person, each story touched me in ways I never anticipated. And each motivated me to work harder and longer to see that their stories continued to matter.

My companion LIVESTRONG Leaders, hundreds scattered in all corners of the world, became a precious, treasured family. Both their stories and the stories they brought of others, became the oxygen in my air, the soil for my growth, the energy for my work.

While I'm not leaving the field, just changing where I fall in the lineup, now is a point of summing up. This decade of mine has meant the sadness and pain of loss, the joy of group support and caring, the shared determination of cancer fighters and the elation of each individual's personal triumph. This decade of mine has brought love and friendship unimaginable before my venture in LIVESTRONG. This decade of mine has meant stories in which I will find comfort and meaning as long as I live and love. May the next decade offer as much reward.

This blog is dedicated to Ty Wakefield and Courtney Clifford - the first two young adult cancer fighters I encountered on my LIVESTRONG path. Both were lost very young. Both had an impact that not only went far beyond their years, but continues to this day.